30.11.06

Diet is a four letter word


Since a sizeable proportion of the world as I know it is about to embark on a crazy eating binge any minute, I want to get this off my chest now:

I don´t care if you´re on a diet.
I don´t care if you mean to go on a diet soon.
I´m not interested in the latest wonder-diet your cousin has told you about.
I don´t care if your zip doesn´t do up.

So you feel guilty about eating. SO WHAT?

If you don´t want to eat, fine.
If you want to spend january fasting, fine.
If you want to jump out of a window, go ahead and be my guest.

Just don´t, please, please, moan about the cream and the butter and the chocolate and the almonds, while stuffing your face.

Also, don´t imply I´m stupid by telling me how many calories are in a bite of turrón. I KNOW.

You only make the food turn to ashes in my mouth, and you make me want to drown you in the punch bowl.
And this is supposed to be the season of good cheer and goodwill, after all, so I´d really appreciate it if you´d just shut up and be a good guest.

There. Aren´t I quite the little ray of seasonal sunshine?

14 comentarios:

xps dijo...

yesssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss!

Traci dijo...

I'd read your blog if it weren't so fattening - I'm on a diet.

Just kidding. Diets are lame. It's annoying to cook something wonderful and listen to people moan about its caloric content. It makes me want to snatch food away from them, then eat it in front of them.

bea at La tartine gourmande dijo...

ah yes, diets...tough world. I am glad I was never on one! I would become the grumpiest most-unfriendly French chick!

rhea dijo...

I completely agree.

Anónimo dijo...

Full of holiday cheer- I hate people who see me eating something delicious/decadent and then remark sourly, "Oh I'd love to eat that but it's full of fat/calories/whatever." I feel like slapping them because obviously I've decided to ignore that (I'm no supermodel in terms of weight) and enjoy but there they go ruining it for me. Thanks a LOT... I feel like bashing their heads in...

Julie dijo...

I'd say you better not keep any punch bowls in the house. Just as a precaution.

LE BLOG dijo...

Diet? What's that?

lobstersquad dijo...

xps: absolutely
Traci: If it´s something you´ve cooked, I think murder is almost justified.
Bea: oh, I thought French women don´t get fat, ever!
Rhea: yep. good.
Yvo: Those people, honestly, we should all take up arms...
Julie: good idea. still, with so many carving knives around...
Le blog: my thoughst exactly

Ellie dijo...

Your guests were complaining about the calories in food? Geezus - I'm sorry, but that's just downright rude! They came over for a feast and I assume that's what they got - did they expect a carrot and two lettuce leafs??

Anónimo dijo...

Ha ha ha ha ha - Ximena, this is a post that should be printed up on napkins, so that annoying guests may study it as they are waiting to be served!

Tanna dijo...

Yes I really think you should do this up on napkins. It's too funny.

Ivonne dijo...

Brava, Lobstersquad!

Let the eating begin!

Rebecca dijo...

I couldn't agree more; I really get annoyed when someone eats something and then says they feel "guilty" - I'm thinking what?! Unless they are referring to the unequal distribution of global resources they should just shut up and if they are going to eat it enjoy it or not eat it. Guilt is an emotion that shouldn't apply to eating.

ASMEO dijo...

If only it were just at this time of year... I have stopped eating lunch with a particular colleague of mine, whom I otherwise quite like, because she thinks it her duty to tell everyone around her how many calories are in the food we eat! I tried to shut her up by poiting out that my calories were at least homemade and not full of E-god-knows-what, but to no awail. Now I eat at my desk while spiritually gorging myself on... food blogs!

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